@GrantTanaka: sorry i'm still an undecided voter, but it's hard to pick just one when I love them both so very very much
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@ElliotHetherton: Me: I got mugged today Friend: you should tell the police [later] Sting: there is literally nothing I can do to help you
@PetrickSara: Them: children are innocent and go to heaven Me: so you're saying Hell is child free?
@FuckabillyRex: Her: Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Me: It's a meatball sub and I'm happy as long as I don't have to share