@Nikkeya08: Sorry my diet made me slap the oreo out of your toddler's hand and scream "NOT TODAY SATAN!"
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@kingstonstreet: The pen is mightier than the sword. Unless you have like three followers then go with the sword
@ohen39: Cop: Sir, don't lock your kid in there, it's very hot. Me [closing car door]: It's okay *leans in* it's not my kid.
@Dawn_M_: Don't date men who will hold open a door for you. Date men who will punch a squirrel in the face for chittering it's teeth at you.