@Robski_Boy: Sorry Siri, talking to machines is not for me. I still get tongue-tied at the drive-through.
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@smedlee: "No Kanye, it's called Coney Island." "Kanye Island." "Coney Island" "Kanye Island." "Co... ney." "Kan... ye."
@Epygma: [Dads birthday] "Make a wish Dad" *Dad blows out candles *Looks around *Looks @ wife Where did our son go? -What son? *Dad cries with joy
@DanMentos: "We were trapped in the elevator and had to make a terrible decision" Which was? "We ate Bill" OMG. How long were you in there? “4 minutes"