@SadieSkyNinja: Sorry that I took a picture of my armpit and tried to pass it off as my thigh gap.
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@liz_buckley: People laughed when I said I wanted to be a professional snooker player. They're not laughing now because it was ages ago.
@Brianhopecomedy: My wife handed me a mop so I inspected it and said, "You're good to go, woman!" and now the mop handle is in a funny place.
@Tayyxb: David Cameron: "In some parts of Britain there are three generations of families where nobody has ever worked." Buckingham Palace?