@BruceForce: Sorry waiter for pushing you over when you asked me to tip you
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@JediGigi: Interviewer: Your resume only has "Mad" under "Skills" Me: Yeah boyee Interviewer: *tears up* You're just what we need. Welcome to Subway.
@_Sal_Paradise_: *wears an "Only God Can Judge Me" t-shirt to court*
@vornietom: The classiest Minion is called a Filet Minion please fave and RT
@SortaBad: Executive: What should we name the mutant with neato magnetic powers? Me: [clearly joking] How about Mag-Neato? Exec: damn that's so good
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