@spacej_me: Sorry you handed me your baby and I immediately put it in the garbage I thought that's what we were doing.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MandiAtRandom: "Never go to bed angry" is some solid advice if you want to stay up until 3am fighting
@_tomcrowley: it's been 12 years since Shrek came out, I still can't get over the fact that Donkey had sex with a dragon..
@lazerdoov: *bursts into starbucks* Me: DO YOU GUYS HAVE A POWER OUTLET Barista: yeah over there Me: oh thank god *plugs in a mechanical bull*
@BoozeWallet: *opens kitchen garbage to discover there's no bag in it* *walks 6 miles to gas station to throw out kleenex rather than putting new bag in*