@MindBlowing: Soul mates theory
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@sarcasm_inc: *approaches your table* Magic trick? *I hold out some cards with fake hands while my real hand pokes out of my shirt and steals your burger*
@IamEnidColeslaw: what did I do this weekend? saw 50 Shades Darker & coughed through the whole movie on purpose
@TimB5150: I miss the days if you were angry while on the phone, you could slam it down without costing $400!
@LaLuchaNix: My husband says none of my metaphors make any sense. He is just an empty canoe in the snow.