@juneohara65: Sound smarter than you are: end words with "eaux" and sentences with "if you will." If you're pissed, "quite frankly" adds a nice touch.
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@decentbirthday: me: i have test anxiety classmate: it's okay, jesus has answers jesus: *descending from sky* the first three are all D
@RocketRankoon: "What time is it?" *pulls out phone, checks Twitter, puts phone away* *Still has no idea what time it is*
@JosephScrimshaw: Actually Frankenstein was the name of the scientist. I, the person correcting you on this trivial point, am the monster.