@lecalabara: Spanish people feed their horses hay, but the naughty ones get George.
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@meganamram: I love therapy sessions because I get to cry for an hour. It usually freaks out my patient, though
@Gennefer: I like the idea of almond milk, but then I can't get the image out of my head of someone milking a nut.
@JB4Realz: INTERVIEWER: What would you say is your greatest weakness? ME: Well, for starters, I'm unemployed.
@NatasshaStash: A nice way to tell someone their breath stinks, "well I'm bored,let's go brush our teeth" in mid convo