@Asbo_Unicorn: Spelling is very important in cosmetic surgery no one wants buttocks injected into their face
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@Kyle_Lippert: My ex and I would role play from time to time. She would dress up as a teacher and call my mother to tell her that I ate the Crayons again.
@Discourt: Just told my toddler to eat 5 bites of her dinner, to which she replied I was horrible. So I counted the number 3 twice. Biotch.
@awkwardphilippe: [Jedi Academy] Why do you want to be Jedi? [Imagines using 'the force' to steal everyone's cats and building a cat army] To keep the peace
@LifesGoodThing: Dear women, 3 reasons why you need to accept we men are mature. No 1. We know what upsets you. No 2. Hahahahahaha... I said "number 2"