@wingzfly: Spent all day doing one of my favorite things ever - not dying. Score.
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@liamoryan: Rest of world: don't do anything crazy plz UK: fk u we used to own u watch this *does backflip *money falls out of pockets *cracks head open
@Sassafrantz: The average person has sex 103 times a year and it's almost March so that means only 103 more to go.
@byrdie_num_num: My wife and I used to describe our marriage as 'forever', now we both prefer the term 'ad nauseam'.