@MrGynosaur: Sprinklers are just little heads looking around for their friends but they can't find them so they cry
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@ashlar36: Fact: Canadians are legally allowed to be late for work once a week for 'reindeer related delays.'
@platinum2000: *At the Carnival* Me: How much for the petting zoo? Person: What? *Drunk at Walmart by the dressing rooms*
@Sickayduh: Good cop: We got you red-handed! Weatherman cop: Well there's a 70% chance of guilt but I'd go ahead and make weekend plans