@MrGynosaur: Sprinklers are just little heads looking around for their friends but they can't find them so they cry
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@thatUPSdude: Me: Want some of my nachos? Coworker: I don't like nachos. Me: Hello 911, what's consider premeditated murder?
@cray_at_home_ma: Hubs: Kids are still asleep! Know what that means? Me: We have to be quick! *Runs to the hidden box of Cocoa Puffs and pours 2 big bowls*
@donni: Stop saying "There's plenty of fish in the sea." I'm sick of fish seducing all our human women!