@TheTimmyToes: stadium announcer: "STADIUM!"
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@Shanehasabeard: Haha, I feel sorry for all you losers who missed out on the Bitcoin train. You should've bought in years ago, like me: A perfectly normal man who coincidentally hoarded a virtual currency during a time when it's only use was for sex trafficking and purchasing organs.
@ValeeGrrl: Me: [in bathroom] 7yo: [knocks] MOMMY? Me: Yeah pal 7: IT'S ME Me: I know 7: YOUR SON Me: Knew that too
@abbycohenwl: Guy: How many puppies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Do you know yet? Me (in a sea of puppies): No, they haven't done it. Bring more