@wesleybordelon: Standing in the boys clothes section at Kohls waiting for my wife. I just realized I look creepy. Better move to the little girls section.
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@ghostkrogh: america: tremble at our nuclear might also america: we skip the number 13 on elevators when we build skyscrapers cos that's spooky
@DrDogMD: PATIENT: I bet medical school was pretty tough DR DOG: yeah I remember one time I did an assignment 4 times bc I ate the first 3 copies lol
@Crunk_Jews: Apparently, you still fail a roadside sobriety test if you just lay down and take a nap.
@CulturedRuffian: INSTRUCTIONS FOR HUSBANDS TOLD TO DO LAUNDRY: 1.Know when to hold em 2.Know when to fold em 3.Know when to walk away 4.Know when to run