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@WilliamRodgers: This guy at the bar wouldn't shut up about how Zombies "could be real" So I killed him... If he comes back...He wins the argument
@withanewname: If Miley doesn't get her shit together, all these Hannah Montana collectibles are never gonna get my kids through college
@ThaJawn: Phill: *gets stung by a stingray Me: *pees on his wound Phill: That only works on jellyfish stings Me: Oh shit, I thought you were dead!
@ArfMeasures: [in space] ASTRONAUT: Up here you can have delusions ME: Haha I don't think so A: They can seem real GANDALF: Don't believe him ME: I don't