@icecube: Stealing endorsements is not how you become the president of the United States, homie. Leave my name out ya mouth...
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@caroline_umc: Ever been so completely out of toilet paper that you send your kid next door to get some? Me neither, I just like to embarrass my kid.
@drinksmcgee: If you're going to lie about where you're from, at least try to make it sound like a real place and not something fake like "New Zealand"
@turtledumplin: My oldest son & his gf were cooking & asked me how many 1/4 cups are in 1 cup .... Gonna write a nasty letter 2 college & ask for a refund