@YoungNobler: Sticking a $5 bill into a vending machine turns it into my grandmother, dispensing stale snacks and rare dollar coins.
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@Spaced_Cowboy00: Women remember something that happened five years ago. I can't remember why I stood up.
@3sunzzz: If you don't let me in the bathroom, I can't guarantee your safety when you pee. ~dogs, apparently
@usermcuserface: No I don't want to go camping. I go to a dead end job 40+ hours a week just so I don't have to sleep outside.
@Xoolun: I hate it when TV shows say they contain "adult situations" but then don't show anyone going to a job they hate, and paying their bills.