@RikNasty2Point0: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I live in Canada. So, free health care.
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@Brentweets: "Hi doc!" "Hi! What is that behind your ear?" "Nice try, too old for the coin trick" "No it's a tumor" "Oh my god" "Kidding it's a quarter"
@mechapoetic: poor person eats crappy cheap food: YOU'RE UNHEALTHY & A STRAIN ON THE SYSTEM poor person eats fresh fruit: THIS IS WHY YOU HAVE NO SAVINGS
@SortaBad: "wow this rap song is good I wonder who this is" *waits literally 4 seconds* "oh there look at that he said his name how convenient"
@Jenny4ashley: Post that you're pregnant on facebook: 88 likes and 31 comments. Tweet that you're pregnant on twitter: 2 stars and 491 unfollows