@iamjeffsloan: Still super weird to me that humans can make other smaller humans. I wish mozzarella sticks could make other smaller mozzarella sticks.
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@TheDailySchmuck: I'm black but not " can't understand the Winter Olympics" black. Those guys in the ski race are running from cops on a bobsled, right?
@Thynebear: "What? Only 2% Milk? Then what's the other 98%!?" [bull walking confidently out of the factory] Oh you don't wanna know
@reczit: Eighty seven percent of single people are single because they don't want to share their pizza with anyone.
@LostFelicia: Sometimes I have a life and other times I surf YouTube videos looking for a good fight in the comments section.