@ericsshadow: STOP TEXTING ME. IF I EVER PLANNED ON TALKING TO YOU AGAIN I WOULDN'T HAVE BORROWED ALL THAT MONEY.
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@hippieswordfish: CARTOON VILLAIN: how did you know it was me who robbed the bank COP: you were literally carrying around giant bags with dollar signs on them
@Love_bug1016: Gentle reminder to send that good morning text so she doesn't have to draw on her angry eyebrows.