@LoveNLunchmeat: STOP WHINING KIDS! If mommy wants to listen to a bunch of people whining for no reason, she'll log into twitter.
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@Lerky: Me: you're like heroin. Her: Why? Because you're addicted to me? Me: No, because you're ruining my life.
@laurajennyjo: I'm gonna start following my cat to the litter box and sit in her lap while she takes a shit
@kwirkyKerri: The spider I let live in my kitchen is letting the bugs run amok. No free rides! Your days are numbered missy.