@Dawn_M_: Strangers get so paranoid when they catch you stirring a mysterious powder into their drink.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Nahdude83: *puts sunglasses on a watermelon* *punches watermelon* "WHERE ARE ALL THE DRUGS!" *slams hands down* "WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DID THEM ALL?!"
@XplodingUnicorn: 5-year-old: How many pull-ups can you do? Me: 22. Wife: How many with witnesses? Me: Almost 1.
@SarcasticCharm: Drank enough whiskey to talk the husband into a Titanic reenactment. He's laying in the snow and I won't share the picnic table with him.
@McInappropriate: NEW DRINKING GAME: 1) Put on the new Twilight movie 2) When you press play, take 59 shots of vodka so you can die before it starts.