@meganamram: Such a double standard that when a guy sleeps with a ton of people he's "cool," but when I do I'm "lying"
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@dafloydsta: Road rage, because yelling and cursing at strangers in the safety of your vehicle is fun. Unless they have a gun.
@SlickestOfRicks: "Maybe connect two monocles together? Pretty good idea. I have to write this down." - the guy that invented the pen
@ObviouslyJustMe: Jesus said to Peter, "Come forth and I will give you eternal glory." Peter came fifth and won a toaster.
@spark_asis: I don't get why someone would want the house in a divorce. "your honor, I'd like to keep the building where my soul was sucked dry."