@SteveDutzy: Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.
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@RatCasket: [ISIS cuts off some dudes heads] Whoa thats messed up you better quit it! [ISIS breaks old rocks] OKAY WE HAVE TO STOP THEM NOW.
@AristotlesNZ: Turns out exposing yourself to different cultures just gets you arrested in multiple countries.
@thatUPSdude: Don't you hate when somebody gives you the finger in traffic and then you have to follow them home and loosen the lug nuts on their wheels.