@SteveDutzy: Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.
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@ClichedOut: Reasons I visit a TL: 1. You're a genius 2. You're far from a genius 3. I like you 4. I know you hate me and want you to know I know
@Mister_Veritas: ME: Hey buddy, your dog left a little 'present' on my lawn GUY: Huh? ME: *points to tiny, nicely wrapped gift* Thank him for me, willya?
@markydoodoo: Ever try spreading really cold butter on toast? I'm like the human version of that.
@Underchilde: Stop, drop and roll if your clothes are on fire or if you spot your ex under the mistletoe.