@juliussharpe: Sucks the USA lost. Now we can't keep watching TV at work.
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@PaperWash: [Oreo meeting] What about 'sextuple stuffed' "That's just inappropriate Jeff you're fired" [later googling Sextuple] "Omg that's genius"
@AndyAsAdjective: The Roomba vacuum cleaner just beat me to a piece of popcorn I dropped on the floor & this is how the war against the machines begins.
@Jennuflect: [me as a DJ] Where my single ladies at? *drunk responses* This one's for you *turns off music, serious tone* This is a bad place to meet men