@50ShadesGran: Suddenly she was on her back, clothes strewn everywhere and her wrists bound to her ankles. She always had trouble hanging out the washing.
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@TheToddWilliams: Boss: It's been a tough year Jim J: Am I laid off? B: No J: Fired? B: No J: What then? B: You're to be executed at noon. J: This is bullshit
@OrvllShrednbchr: 10 years ago, as a joke, I told everyone I was giving up sex for Lent. Haven't gotten laid since. Well played, God.