@djderk: Suicide terrorists: jokes on you! Virgins totally suck. Have fun jerking off while she cries.
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@prufrockluvsong: Welcome to IKEA. I see you need a new Fyrkantig for your Dagstorp. Me:How do you pronounce that? *sound of corduroy pants rubbing together
@malt_skull: [Spider-Man shows up at my house] *I carefully scoop him up on a piece of paper and release him outside my door*