@Travon: Sunday is Easter, Hitler's birthday, the Columbine anniversary, and weed Christmas. Your move, greeting card section.
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@KalvinMacleod: INTERVIEWER: your resume says that you take things too literally ME: how the hell did my resume say that?
@DaddyJew: Oh no, my kid got upset at me and locked himself in his room. What ever will I do. Margarita anyone?
@fuzzlime: I thought it was a staring contest but then I realized the guy had a glass eye so now I can never go back to that gas station again.