@_Tempo11: Sure I get excited when he unzips his pants. I'm pretending it's the sound of his body bag.
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@JohnLyonTweets: Instead of a happy ending the masseuse gave me an indie movie ending. She stopped suddenly at a random point and left everything unresolved.
@reTICKulous: *pulls out earbud* What? "We need to talk." *pulls out earbud* "You've been spending too much time at Chernobyl." *pulls out earbud* No way