@Jenny4ashley: Sure she mainly used knife emojis but at least she replied to your text.
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@thevirtualidiot: On second thought this "Thug's Life" tattoo probably shouldn't have been done in Comic Sans.
@XplodingUnicorn: *quits Twitter to spend time with family* *remembers what family is like* *quits family for Twitter*
@OneFunnyMummy: I don't know why friends and family keep getting pregnant when I have two kids right here they can have.
@KeetPotato: [sex-ed lesson] now, unroll the condom down over the bana- what is it keith? "i ate my banana"