@aka_fatman: Sure, your carpenter could turn water into wine, Father. Now let ME tell you about a plumber who can increase his size by eating mushrooms.
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@Jinxy00: Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like BBs, rub one ball & everything moves.
@UncleDuke1969: Jim ate my sandwich. It was clearly labeled. Jim's email is open on his PC. Jim's son now thinks he's adopted. The sandwich was LABELED.
@aveuaskew: The only cat like reflex I possess is turning and staring at the wall when you talk to me.
@OneFunnyMummy: On bad days I like to take a pregnancy test to remind myself that things could be much worse.