@DvuslyMarvelous: TacoBell - America's preferred over-the-counter laxative
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@perhapssomeday: My mother arrives on Friday, so I have to do three months worth of cleaning in 48 hours. Also, lose 30 pounds and live up to my potential.
@Nikkeya08: My husband just got to level three on netflix: "faking an illness" to finish binge watching I'm on level 6: "faking your own abduction"
@dhumann: Like that scene in 'The Revenant' where Leo is mauled by the bear but it's just me at your wedding reception dancing with your grabby aunt.