@robdelaney: Take 1/5th the $ car insurance companies spend on advertising, apply it to health care, and everyone can have golden organs and never die.
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@delusionaliam: "Hey! check out my new ink" *removes shirt, stands naked* "Dude!, I don't see anything" "It's invisible ink"
@MaraWritesStuff: BROTHER: The Godfather is on? That's not very Thanksgiving-y. ME: Well, it's about family...
@ericsshadow: 20 yr old mom: my child is my life I would give my own life for him 40 yr old mom: GET OFF THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW OR I WILL END YOU