@LurkAtHomeMom: Take a day off. Pamper yourself. Visit a spa. Pour melted wax on ur body. Rip the hair out by the roots. Inject poison into ur face. Relax.
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@UncleDuke1969: "The powder | "The pow| "The power | "The power of Cheese | "The power of Ch| "The power of Christ compels you!" - The AutocorrExorcist
@ieatanddrink: My daughter called me "lame." Let's see how "lame" she thinks I am when I pick her and her friends up from the movies in a BOAT
@DadandBuried: You'll never know how creative you really are until you need to start lying to your kids.
@lazerdoov: 1. Take pictures of every cat in your neighborhood 2. Make missing cat posters with the pictures 3. Get all the cats