@imogenjayy: Takes approximately 7.5 seconds for #Adele to make you mourn a relationship that you weren't even in.
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@murrman5: [walking around still disappointed 6 hours after visiting an aquarium] wife: what did you think a tiger shark was, brent
@Loli_Sug: My boss bought a breathalyzer for our office because everyone comes back from lunch drunk. My personal best is .16