@Sarcasmo718: Taking your shirt off when fighting is a great way to tell the cops who to arrest.
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@OmgMeDamnit: Don't waste time thinking about what's wrong with you. Instead, focus on what's wrong with other people.
@P0tterhead_394: "You have a very large package downstairs." I really need to work on how I word things to the men around this office.
@QwertyJones3: So what do you do for a living? "I'm in the Secret Service" Wow, you didn't keep that secret too well did you