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@Dutch_50: When the cleaning lady say's "Have a good night", I try to time it so we say it in unison. Then I say our "You too" response in harmony.
@funflaps: Drug dealer: What do you want? Me: Please give me 17 of your finest *checks note on hand* marriage o'wannas
@moiragallaga: The fact that people use the wrong "your," "there," "it's" and "its" yet spell "Bieber" correctly just kills me.