@PsstCaptain: Teens today have it so easy. We didn't have self-checkout lanes when WE bought condoms.
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@NicestHippo: WIFE: He thinks he's a news anchor DOCTOR: Is this true ME: [stacking papers & talking inaudibly as the camera zooms out]
@FeralCrone: I'm wearing black with navy blue today. Fight me. Any bruising will only serve to tie it all together.
@joejwest: COP: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea SUSPECT: Is it bring your kid to work day? LITTLE GIRL: [slams fist on desk] Answer the question