@thenatewolf: Telescopes probably use mirrors which means there is absolutely no way to know how many vampires there are in space.
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@WilliamAder: What are people in motels doing that they need such a steady and reliable source of ice?
@montgomaryrock: Give a man a six pack and he'll drink for a day. Give him a 24 pack and he'll drink for a day.
@KateWhineHall: Pro tip: When quickly pulling into your garage to avoid your neighbor be sure your garage door is all the way up.
@themorris23: And remember kids, when you go to Target, there really is no "non creepy" way to ask where the Vaseline is.