@copymama: Telling a mom to relax while her family does everything on Mother’s Day is like telling a pilot to relax while the passengers fly the plane.
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@fmanjoo: In general my philosophy is do whatever you want if it doesn't hurt people and it's not two spaces after a period.
@abbycohenwl: Watch me get this baby up to 90 miles per hour! - inventor of the infant catapult moments before his arrest
@rebrafsim: [thrift store] Me: I'd like one thrift, please Cashier: sir, we sell used- Me: money is no object C: we don't- M: I need a thrift
@on_the_fritz_17: "Head, shoulders, knees, and toes" is beautiful to hear in a children's classroom - but not at the site of a plane crash.