@proEXgirlfriend: Telling people to ban same sex marriage cuz of your religion is like telling the supermarket to stop selling junk food cuz you're on a diet.
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@rickolantern: [making yellowjackets] Angel: These things don't really do anything other than sting people God: We're running out of college mascots
@petemandik: I believe: - I can fly. - Children are the future. - Knowledge is power. - I will use my powers to defeat the future children.
@briangaar: *interrupts parent & child on bus* Actually thats not true, Wolverine has died many times *they get up* Your mother cant shelter you forever
@marcia_bee: Coworker: I lost my phone. Me: WHAT? CW: I don't know where it is. M:*perplexed look* You're not glued to it like a NORMAL person? Freak!