@knot_eye: Ten out of ten pigs prefer turkey bacon over regular bacon.
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@rainbowrowell: These protests are PLANNED. These opposition groups are ORGANIZED. My enemies are USING CALENDARS. Someone signed up to BRING DOUGHNUTS.
@sixfootcandy: Me: I don’t understand why I’m not losing weight. Husband: Maybe it’s the 5,000 calories in gummies you eat every day. Me: They’re vitamins!