@Fickle_Filly: Terminate an unwanted conversation with someone you haven't seen for years with the words, "Wow. You've aged badly..."
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@BromanConsul: What idiot called it the Police/Fire Department Headquarters and not GUNS 'N HOSES?
@Sickayduh: "Oooh look! Is that a comet?" - Well, actually the airport is real close by "Oh ok. Good idea. I'll call them and ask"
@Playing_Dad: *consoling friend who is a baker* I'm really sorry about the fire at your bread shop. Looks like your business is toast now.