@Ivsy01: Text: ARE YOU ALIVE? Me: Why?
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@Marcmywords2: Hey Dad, your neighbor called, they wanna know if you could turn down your TV, they've already heard this episode of Law & Order.
@GrandadJFreeman: Girls are like police. Even when they get a hold of all the evidence, they still want to hear the truth from you...
@jackiembouvier: [First date] Me: So, I've been married for 12 years - Him: You're married?? Me: Is that a problem?