@NickSwardson: Thank god 4 the guy at the bar yelling "YOU GOTTA CATCH THAT!!!" when a receiver drops the ball. Had no idea he was supposed to catch it.
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@alli_win: I'm convinced that Santa is so jolly because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
@GrantTanaka: Look, if you need a heimlich, just ask me nicely, enough of this flapping your arms and making faces shit.
@audipenny: When someone tries to argue with me I'm like "hey pal let me stop you right there" and then physically turn them around to face someone else