@goldengateblond: Thank you, true crime show, for saying that was a reenactment. I was pretty upset your camera person didn't stop that murder.
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@djdarrellripley: Him: I'll pay for dinner. Me: I want to pay. Him: I'll feel better if you let me pay. Me: Well, if your health is involved, go ahead...
@Reverend_Scott: Noah: An ark? Full of animals?? God: ... Noah: You even listening?? God: Sorry what? I was checking out the iPhone 6. This thing is garbage.
@amydillon: Not sure if I should be more concerned about the son who locked me out of my bedroom today, or the one who showed me how to pick the lock.