@bourgeoisalien: Thanks for telling me I'm really funny 'for a girl.' You're really stupid for a human.
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@delusions_of: Only resort to violence when necessary like when the grocery store won't accept your coupon.
@i_Lean: Studying abroad: Spending months in another country. Studying a broad: Spending months Facebook stalking Ashley.
@slaughthie: My coworker was like "I love kids! Can't finish a whole one by myself though hahaha!" And I was just like wow I could easily eat like 5.