@underchilde: Thanks for telling me to take some ibuprofen for my headache, hotshot. If we're ever in an apocalypse and need a doctor, I'm nominating you!
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@Mikecanrant: Its weird that goldfish will eat other goldfish but wont eat goldfish crackers. Life sure is complicated sometimes.
@LuvPug: Just made an annoying kid shut right up by making a throat slash gesture. So I guess you could say I'm like a child whisperer.
@TheMichaelRock: Mall Santa: what do you want for Christmas? Me: drugs. Mall Santa *whispers* meet me in the food court in 20 minutes.