@gorrdano: Thanks, I wrote the tweet. There's no need to reiterate it back to me with quotation marks.
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@Midgetspar: I received a basketball in the mail from Amazon. I haven't played basketball in 20 years but apparently drunk me thinks I'm Michael Jordan.
@robfee: Everyone in horror movies: *Loud scream* It was probably just the wind. *Ghost flies across room* Just the wind. *Dog gets cut in half* Wind
@stevevsninjas: Judge: Guilty Me: Sayyoudidwhat. Judge: What did you say? Me: Judge? Did you just reverse my sentence? *Stage dives into cheering jury*