@SarahR_82: That awkward moment when u lock binoculars with your neighbor.
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@TheRealRHB: Just because I reported several women to HR for not washing their hands after using the rest room doesn't mean the camera they found is mine
@Tommytoughstuff: "DOUG YOU'RE THE NEXT CONTESTANT ON THE PRICE IS RIGHT!" [camera pans to me struggling with Doug for his name tag]
@ediblemousefeet: Wife: is that our guinea pig? Me: yes and I've named her gwyn Wife: why Me: *whispers* gwyny pig